How to Be a Good Dominant?
How to Be a Good Dominant?
Playing a dominant role in a relationship does not mean you only need to guide the way in the bedroom. Women love guys who can take charge in every aspect of the relationship, but there can be a narrow line between being controlling and dominant. Dominance does not give you the privilege to do or say whatever you want to the submissive partner. It does not allow you to manipulate or bully your companions into engaging in things they never want to do. Instead, display your true dominance through the power of your character and how you make your partner feel safe and protected. Keep reading the rest of the discussion below to understand how to be a good dominant.
Work on Your Confidence
The dominant partner needs to project the right attitude in every scene. You ought to show presence with domineering actions, which you must approach confidently. Confidence will prevent you from acting with timidity in every role you may wish to try during the scene. Being cocky can make the submissive partner feel as if you are insecure and inexperienced in exploring kinky sex styles.
However, taking everything new slowly and keeping low pressure is vital, as learning to be confident in new roles can be challenging. For example, try one or two dominant moves whenever you have kinky sex. If you are comfortable with such new moves, you can control the play and scale it up. Also, there is nothing wrong with practicing dirty talk early or rehearsing your moves alone in the room to identify what works for you.
Establish What Your Partner Needs
There are several ways partners can play dominant and submissive roles in the sex scenes. It is essential to discuss with your companions ahead of time to know the time of dynamics they are looking for in adventurous sex. There is a difference between partners who want to act defiant for you to tame them into submission and those that want you to tie scarfs around their hands for restraint.
Discuss the soft and hard limits to know what you need to do or avoid. Such a discussion will help you know your partner’s bounders and stick to the limits. Dominance means that you understand what kinky sex means and seek consent before exploring anything new.
Use Light Restraints
Ensure you keep the bondage accessories light and comfortable if you want to use them in any sex scene. There is no reason to grab the faux leather and chain bondage if they are not among the fantasies that your partner wants to fulfill. Ensure you pick a pair of adjustable handcuffs with good lining for the wrists if you have to use such bondage.
Alternatively, you may use silicone handcuffs as another restraint accessory that is comfortable to wear and pleasant to touch. Also, good dominance extends to using a silky scarf or soft eye mask when blindfolding your partner for a steamy session. You can use the same scarf to bind their wrists and tie them on the bedposts.
Obey the Safe Words
Participants in BDSM scenes use safe words to halt the play if someone crosses a hard limit. It is prudent to set appropriate safe words with your sub before engaging in any rough play, including sadism, sex, or bondage. The traffic light system is the most common technique to set such words. Green shows that everything is alight, while amber or orange implies that you are almost reaching some limits or something is not okay. Red indicates that everything should stop immediately. Ensure you substitute these colors with appropriate hand signals when you gag your sub. Adhering to safe work will help you stick to safe sex and avoid moves that may harm your partner.
Always Remember the Aftercare
Taking submissive roles in BDSM sex can expose you to an awkward mental space with the bondage, dominance, submission, and masochism your experience. The submissive partner should be made to feel safe again after surrendering her control to the dominant player. Some people love being submissive only when in bed and never outside such a context. As a result, they may experience some cognitive disturbance when the sexy feeling and arousal subside.
Therefore, giving your partners quality aftercare is vital after being dominant with them during a rigorous sexual encounter. Cuddling may be a good start, but you must explore what the submissive partner considers ideal aftercare. For instance, a gentle massage to relax the muscles will be good enough to bring your companion to reality after rigorous sexual acts.
Do what you can to ensure your sub knows how much you appreciate the kinky moments you spend together. Dominance during BSDM sex can involve a lot of work, but that does not mean you compromise safety on the scene or cross the hard limits. Focus on being a friendly dominant by adhering to safe sexual acts in every kinky hookup.